EXCEL IN PARENTING

EXCEL IN PARENTING

By: Denise Bennett, PT

Growing up I often thought too much was made of developing leadership skills.  If you think about it, there are far fewer leaders in this world than followers.  After working with children for over 30 years and raising one of my own, I can now say that developing leadership skills is critical.  In my particular specialty, behavior problems can often be part of the issues I will address with a child.  I have been asked many times “Why do they do what you tell them but not what I tell them?” One of the pieces I can often see missing, is a lack of leadership skills in the child’s parent. In the absence of a true leader, the child will take over that role and they are ill equipped for such responsibility.

One tip I often give parents for helping solidify their role as leader is to require the use of  “asking words”.  Often, children are allowed to fire off demands or commands throughout the day.  For instance, “I’m hungry” or “I want a drink” gets them exactly what they desire.  While food and drink are necessary for life, it is not obligatory that adults produce them on command.  Requiring the child to use asking words like “May I have a drink?” or “May I have a snack?” not only teaches good manners, but reinforces that you are the leader.   Reinforcing this throughout the day to play with toys, watch a show, call a grandparent, etc. helps the child to understand the role of the parent in their lives.  This lays a foundation for the child to understand that the parent is the leader and should be respected.  Children with sensory defensiveness can struggle with this.  When a child commands me, I simply model for them what I would like in an unaccusatory manner and ask them to repeat it back to me.  The point is to teach, not to judge.  At that point, I will usually honor the request if possible, to reward the use of asking words.

This will also lay the foundation for effective discipline.  Love and Logic is one of my favorite methods for developing discipline and responsibility in a child.  The idea of consequences for not obeying the leader is more easily understood.  For instance “I can only give toys to children who pick them up when they are done” will be more effective.

Lastly, when asked, I will always tell parents to first examine themselves when they are unhappy with their child’s behavior.  Have they consistently required the use of asking words?  Have they consistently used consequences when needed?  Do they let things slide when busy or tired?  Do they send mixed messages to their child by being inconsistent in their expectations? Do they hold others responsible for their child’s poor behavior?

Learning to respect authorities and leaders and using good manners will only serve our children in this life.  By demonstrating good leadership with your children, they are more likely to model that behavior and become GOOD leaders.

COVID-19 Update 2

Earlier this week, you received a message letting you know that we would need confirmation by 4/24 of your intention to restart therapy at Excel by 5/4. By mandate, stopping therapy for more than 30 days requires some action on the part of the clinic. Since we have not heard from you, we will assume that you have chosen to discharge at this time. As previously stated, we fully understand and respect that decision. We have enjoyed working with your child and hope you will call in the future when you are ready to resume services. As a returning patient, you will be placed at the top of any wait list that may exist at that time. If you received this message in error or you do wish to continue services, please respond to this text or call our office at 972-771-5731. As always, we hope you are doing well and wish your family the best. We are always here if you need us.

COVID-19 Update

Hello from Excel! 

We hope all of you are doing well and staying safe in these uncertain times.  We honor and respect your decision to keep your children home right now but needed to update you on how Excel will be moving forward at this point.  Since we are passing the 30 day mark since stopping therapy with your child, we will need to discharge them from the schedule.  

If you are contemplating a return to therapy by 5/4/20 please contact us by 4/24/20 so that they are not removed from the schedule.  For those planning a return, our new policies will be in place.  This includes curbside drop off and pick up, taking temperatures and checking for symptoms, social distancing within the building with regards to other children, 20 second hand washing before and after each session, and sanitizing equipment between use.  Our therapists will also be wearing masks.  We don’t want any of our families to feel pressure to return.  We support any decisions you make for your children.  Getting Telehealth up and going has definitely been a larger project than we anticipated.  As we move forward with that, we will contact those families who have shown interest.  Having a Telehealth appointment will not hold a clinic appointment slot.  Please reply to this text, send us an email, or call the clinic to let us know your decision regarding continued therapy services by 4/24/20.  Thank you.

DIY HOME PROGRAM

DIY HOME PROGRAM

We hope you’ve enjoyed this month’s DIY projects. We have created this fun home program for you to incorporate all of your new tools and integrate the different sensory systems we discussed. All of our DIY Instructions can be found on our blog. 

Home programs are a vital part of managing your child’s Sensory Integration and a key part of their success. Consistent home program use provides the beneficial exposure and repetition that produces lasting results. Additionally, and maybe most importantly, implementing a home program is a great way to bond with child. That precious one-on-one time is such a valuable way to get to know your child and to show them that you are there.

First, set up your home program stations. Setting the stations up in a sort of loop makes a home program “course”. This allows your child to go through the course multiple times and provides a lot of versatility. If you have an area at home where the stations can remain set up all week that works even better.

Suggested items for this home program:

DIY 2X4 BALANCE BEAM                 BUCKETS OR BOWLS TO TOSS BAGS IN

DIY BEAN BAGS                             TEXTURES: SPONGES, YARN, BRUSHES, SHAVING CREAM, ETC

DIY TACTILE BIN                            SMALL TOYS/NOVELTIES TO HIDE IN THE BIN

DIY OBSTACLE COURSE SUPPLIES:  SIDEWALK CHALK, PAINTER’S/MASKING/DUCT TAPE, CONES

	SUNDAY	MONDAY	TUESDAY	WEDNESDAY	THURSDAY	FRIDAY	SATURDAY
1	JUMPING JACKS	BUNNY HOPS	CRAB WALKS	WHEELBARROW WALKS	HOP ON ONE FOOT	FOLLOW THE LEADER	SIDE STEP OR GRAPEVINE
2	SET UP BOWLS OR BUCKETS ALONG THE BEAM TO TOSS THE BAGS INTO AS YOU WALK THE BEAM	TOSS BEAN BAGS ON DIFFERENT SECTIONS OF THE BEAM THEN WALK THE BEAM STEPPING OVER THE BAGS	PLACE BEAN BAGS ALONG ONE SIDE OF THE BEAM. ARMY CRAWL ALONG THAT SIDE OF THE BEAM, TOSSING THE BAGS OVER THE BEAM AS YOU GO	ZIG ZAG HOP (BOTH FEET TOGETHER) OVER THE BEAM UNTIL YOU REACH THE END	SET UP BOWLS OR BUCKETS AT THE END OF THE BEAM (SKEE BALL STYLE) AND PICK UP BAGS ALONG YOUR WAY DOWN THE BEAM TO TOSS IN	WHEELBARROW WALK ALONG THE BALANCE BEAM (HANDS ON BEAM OR ON EACH SIDE OF)	WALK THE BEAM BACKWARD
3	TRADITIONAL HOPSCOTCH	LAY TUMMY DOWN ON BALANCE BEAM AND TOSS BEAN BAGS ONTO HOPSCOTCH SQUARES	HOPSCOTCH ON ONE FOOT	HOPSCOTCH LIKE A BUNNY (ON BOTH FEET)	WALK THE LINES OF THE HOPSCOTCH HEEL-TO-TOE	HOPSCOTCH BACKWARD	HOPSCOTCH WITH YOUR EYES CLOSED *WITH SUPERVISION
4	HIDE X’S & O’S IN A TACTILE BIN AND DIG UNTIL YOU GET 3 IN A ROW	FILL A COOKIE SHEET WITH SHAVING CREAM AND WRITE YOUR NAME IN IT USING EACH FINGER	HIDE COINS IN A TACTILE BIN AND DIG UNTIL YOU GET $1	PULL DIFFERENT ITEMS FROM A BUCKET OR BIN AND IDENTIFY THEM WITH YOUR EYES CLOSED	HIDE LETTERS IN A TACTILE BIN AND DIG UNTIL YOU MAKE A WORD	FIND THE “MEATBALLS” (ANY SMALL ITEM) IN A POT OF COOKED PASTA (COOLED)	USE A TURKEY BASTER TO TRANSFER WATER FROM ONE BOWL TO ANOTHER
5	USE CHALK LETTERS TO LILLYPAD HOP YOUR WAY ACROSS A WORD	WALK HEEL-TO-TOE ACROSS A PIECE OF TAPE	BEAR WALK YOUR WAY AROUND THE BEAN BAGS YOU TOSSED OVER THE BEAM	DRAW DIFFERENT SHAPES AND HOP TO MATCHES TO MAKE YOUR WAY ACROSS	JOG BACKWARD THROUGH YOUR OBSTACLES	LOG ROLL, STAYING IN BETWEEN TWO LINES OF CHALK OR TAPE	USE YOUR BEAN BAGS AS “CONES” AND ZIG ZAG YOUR WAY AROUND THEM

For a free printable PDF version of this Home Program, CLICK HERE

SENSORY SYSTEMS: TACTILE

SENSORY SYSTEMS: TACTILE

This is our sense of touch.  It is our largest sensory system and it plays a vital role in human behavior, both physical and mental.  Tactile information goes just about everywhere in the brain.  It’s connections to the limbic system make it very important for bonding and developing relationships with others. Children who are hyperresponsive to touch may be very picky about clothing, food, being touched by others, and getting dirty. Children who are hyporesponsive may seek out excessive touch and have a high pain threshold.  Offering a variety of tactile activities is very important for all children.  Good tactile activities include making letters/shapes out of cooked spaghetti, playing in bins with a variety of textures like sand/rice/beans/birdseed, playing in shaving cream, and playing with playdough.  Also include your child in cooking, especially when they can mix food with their hands such as cookie dough, meatloaf, and rubbing oil on vegetables.  Do not force touch if your child is fearful of it.  Let them watch you first and gradually introduce the idea/activity.  Deep pressure into the hands prior to the tactile activities (wheelbarrow walking and animal walks) can be helpful.